private

My body goes numb at the thought of our past My heart tightens, it all hits too fast I pictured life with you — summer swims, cricket games, and Friday nights But then I realised, you’re a dickhead, alright. That night at the party, it caught me by surprise For the first time, a guy liked me… I knew you were no good, but I let it slide when everyone around me said it’d be fine I didn’t even like you, but went with it anyway, because I was finally wanted by a guy I bent the rules for you, yeah, that was a mistake You were my first, made me never trust again I was buzzing inside, all while you were thinking of her You’re just a dickhead who left me behind! Was it something I said, or the way I looked at you? I keep replaying moments, wondering what’s true I thought I mattered, but I guess I was just a placeholder for her. Every little memory won’t let me move on from you I bent the rules for you, yeah, that was a mistake You were my first, made me never trust again I was buzzing inside, all while you were thinking of her You’re just a dickhead who left me behind! I still remember that night after your training when your name popped up on my screen Can’t ignore the voice that whispered you liked me Wait, next to you on the couch when I gave in to everyone’s push For the way your hand found mine, under the stars, watching the minions steal the moon. New party, after all our texts, we ended up side by side again Years I’d waited for a moment like this, sitting against the tree with your arm around me Girl, the way I felt as we held each other standing there To the swag, where my shivers were calmed by your warm embrace Come the next day, you were gone with no words or time for me Back home, when a chat from your familiar Bitmoji lit up my screen, this time for the last time She don’t even like you, I do (I did) Right here, right now, I’m in front of you (not anymore….) I bent the rules for you, boy, what a mistake You were my first, and now I can’t trust again I was buzzing inside, you were buzzing for her You’re just a dickhead who left me behind! You’re just a dickhead, through and through! I’m done with the lies, done with the pain I won’t let your shadow pull me back again I gave my heart, but it’s mine to keep And I am walking away from you

My body goes numb at the thought of our past My heart tightens, it all hits too fast I pictured life with you — summer swims, cricket games, and Friday nights But then I realised, you’re a dickhead, alright. That night at the party, it caught me by surprise For the first time, a guy liked me… I knew you were no good, but I let it slide when everyone around me said it’d be fine I didn’t even like you, but went with it anyway, because I was finally wanted by a guy I bent the rules for you, yeah, that was a mistake You were my first, made me never trust again I was buzzing inside, all while you were thinking of her You’re just a dickhead who left me behind! Was it something I said, or the way I looked at you? I keep replaying moments, wondering what’s true I thought I mattered, but I guess I was just a placeholder for her. Every little memory won’t let me move on from you I bent the rules for you, yeah, that was a mistake You were my first, made me never trust again I was buzzing inside, all while you were thinking of her You’re just a dickhead who left me behind! I still remember that night after your training when your name popped up on my screen Can’t ignore the voice that whispered you liked me Wait, next to you on the couch when I gave in to everyone’s push For the way your hand found mine, under the stars, watching the minions steal the moon. New party, after all our texts, we ended up side by side again Years I’d waited for a moment like this, sitting against the tree with your arm around me Girl, the way I felt as we held each other standing there To the swag, where my shivers were calmed by your warm embrace Come the next day, you were gone with no words or time for me Back home, when a chat from your familiar Bitmoji lit up my screen, this time for the last time She don’t even like you, I do (I did) Right here, right now, I’m in front of you (not anymore….) I bent the rules for you, boy, what a mistake You were my first, and now I can’t trust again I was buzzing inside, you were buzzing for her You’re just a dickhead who left me behind! You’re just a dickhead, through and through! I’m done with the lies, done with the pain I won’t let your shadow pull me back again I gave my heart, but it’s mine to keep And I am walking away from you